The phone is such an integral part of our lives, connecting us with friends, family, and even acquaintances that we almost cannot imagine it being used for nefarious purposes. So what happens when you receive a call from a narcissist only to have them hang up abruptly? Is it a harmless prank, or does it carry a deeper, more sinister meaning?
In this article, we’ll explore the intricacies of why a narcissist calls and hangs up, shedding light on their manipulative behavior and the impact it can have on those on the receiving end.
How Narcissists Use Phone Calls to Manipulate
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a mental disorder characterized by self-centeredness, arrogance, entitlement, and a lack of empathy. Individuals with NPD often engage in manipulative behaviors to maintain control and feed their grandiose sense of self-importance. One such manipulative tactic is making a phone call only to hang up, leaving the recipient bewildered and emotionally charged.
Narcissists are experts at playing mind games, and the phone serves as a powerful tool in their arsenal. When they call and hang up, they are not just engaging in a random act; they are executing a calculated move to achieve their objectives. This is why if you have a narcissist in your life you should make yourself aware of the red flags to watch out for on a call phone with a narcissist. Let’s delve deeper into the reasons why a narcissist might make such a call.
10 Reasons Why a Narcissist Calls and Hangs Up
Reason #1: Control and Power Play
Narcissists thrive on exerting control over others. Making an unexpected call and then abruptly disconnecting gives them a sense of power. They enjoy knowing that they can disrupt your peace at any moment and leave you wondering about their intentions, making control and power play one of the top reasons why a narcissist calls and hangs up.
Example: Imagine you’ve just settled into a quiet evening at home. Your phone rings, and it’s the narcissist. They say nothing and hang up. Instantly, you feel a rush of emotions – confusion, frustration, and a sense of powerlessness. This is precisely what the narcissist aims for – to have control over your emotions and actions.
Reason #2: Seeking Attention
Narcissists have an insatiable need for attention and admiration. By calling and hanging up, they create a situation where you are left wondering why they called, keeping their presence in your thoughts.
Example: You receive a call from the narcissist during an important meeting at work. You step out to answer, only to hear silence before they abruptly end the call. Your thoughts are now consumed by them, and they have successfully inserted themselves into your day, demanding your attention.
Reason #3: Maintaining Dominance
In a narcissistic relationship, dominance is key. Calling and hanging up can be a way for the narcissist to remind you of their authority and keep you on edge, fearing their next move.
Example: You’ve been trying to establish boundaries with the narcissist, asserting your independence. But when they call and hang up, it’s as if they are saying, “I still have control over you.” This undermines your efforts to break free from their dominance.
Reason #4: Testing Boundaries
Narcissists often push boundaries to see how much they can get away with. This behavior can manifest in calling and hanging up as they gauge your reaction and willingness to tolerate their antics.
Example: After a recent argument, you told the narcissist that you needed some space. They call and hang up repeatedly, testing whether you’ll stick to your decision or give in to their manipulation. It’s a test of your resolve and a way to measure their influence over you.
Reason #5: Hoovering
Hoovering is a tactic used by narcissists to draw you back into a relationship after a breakup or period of no contact. When a narcissist calls and hangs up, they create confusion and reignite emotions, making it easier for them to manipulate you into returning.
Example: You’ve finally mustered the courage to break free from the narcissistic relationship and have been maintaining no contact. Suddenly, you receive a call from an unknown number, and when you answer, you recognize their voice. The narcissist hangs up, leaving you torn between your desire for freedom and the emotional turmoil they’ve just stirred up.
Reason #6: Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where the narcissist makes you doubt your own perceptions and reality. Calling and hanging up can be a subtle form of gaslighting, making you question your interpretation of the situation.
Example: You confront the narcissist about their hurtful behavior, and they deny everything. Later, they call and hang up, leaving you wondering if you overreacted. They want you to doubt your feelings and question the validity of your emotions.
Reason #7: Feeling of Entitlement
Narcissists believe they are entitled to special treatment. So, when a narcissist calls and hangs up, it’s as if they expect you to drop everything and cater to their needs, reinforcing their grandiose self-image.
Example: The narcissist knows you have a busy schedule, but they call you during a crucial work presentation. When you prioritize your job over their call, they become offended and accuse you of neglecting them. This sense of entitlement is a hallmark of their narcissistic behavior.
Reason #8: Manipulating Emotions
Narcissists are skilled at manipulating emotions. A sudden call followed by a hang-up can evoke a range of emotions in you, from confusion to anger, which the narcissist can use to their advantage.
Example: You receive a call from the narcissist during a family gathering, and they hang up before you can answer. Your mind races with questions about their intentions. Are they trying to apologize, or is this another attempt to hurt you? The emotional turmoil they’ve caused becomes a weapon they can wield against you.
Reason #9: Testing the Waters
Narcissists are known for their unpredictable behavior. Calling and hanging up allows them to test how you react and assess whether you’re still susceptible to their manipulation.
Example: The narcissist has been distant lately, and you’ve been focusing on healing and moving on. When they suddenly call and hang up, it’s a way for them to gauge your emotional state. Are you still pining for their attention, or have you truly begun to heal?
Reason #10: Pure Malice
Sometimes, a narcissist’s call and hang-up may have no ulterior motive other than to hurt and harm. It’s a manifestation of their toxic and abusive nature, aimed at damaging your emotional well-being.
Example: You’ve cut all ties with the narcissist, and they harbor intense resentment towards you. Out of pure malice, they call and hang up repeatedly, knowing that each call stirs up painful memories and emotions.
Now that we’ve explored these ten reasons , it’s clear that when a narcissist calls and hangs up, it’s not a harmless action but a calculated move to further their self-centered agenda. Understanding their motives can help you better cope with and protect yourself from narcissistic abuse.
Closing Thoughts
Dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally draining and mentally exhausting. When a narcissist calls and hangs up, it’s essential to recognize their manipulative behavior for what it is. By understanding their motives and setting healthy boundaries, you can begin to protect yourself from their toxic influence. Remember that seeking support from a therapist or counselor who specializes in narcissistic abuse can be invaluable in navigating these challenging relationships.